Monday, December 19, 2016

Zynga: Morphing Fun Into Extortion Via Farmville (Revised)

This was originally written by Eva Nottage under her pen name Daima Delamare (Magesplat) in March 2012. This version has been edited and reworked for clarity. 


[This was my first attempt at writing an article for the Bitmob Writing Challenge for the "Coins and Sense" theme. I had to edit most of it out for the challenge to keep it to 800 words, so I'm posting the full version here. The shorter version that was posted on Bitmob (now GamesBeat) is here.]


It's easy to look down on Farmville and be a hater because it's a Facebook game. At the start, Farmville was a simple game with a simple premise of repetitive actions that wasn't for everyone. Fair enough. But over time it's morphed from a fun (imho) game to a money making thing to it's current incarnation as an... awful greed monster of a thing. On one hand, I'm fascinated and amazed. On the other, seriously disgusted. There is nothing wrong with making money, but the methods used by Zynga have gone too far. Both in the game itself, and the curious incident where Zynga has allegedly copied another studios game....

I realize it's pretty easy to just sling things around, so I've gone through the last few seasonal events which show a remarkable increase of the money hounding that goes on in the game.

Farmville as it once was, was a game that I found relaxing. Mundane, but relaxing. I could either get to my crops in time... or not. It was a game to explore and have fun with on my own time. Eventually they added the ability to build things, and one would need to ask their neighbors for items so they could build those things. Asking for items is done one of two ways. The first way is a direct request that goes through the game to a specific neighbor within the game. The second way is where the game posts to your Facebook wall on your behalf asking your friends to click the link to send you the items - and any one of a person's Facebook friends who is playing the game can then click the link and it will send the requested item to you. As people got bored and stopped playing Farmville, those who were still playing the game found themselves either struggling to complete things or simply unable to get the materials they needed to play the game. Which in turn, drove another bunch of people away from the game.

Eventually they added a feature where you could be neighbors with people who were not on your own Facebook friends list and maintain your privacy. Which, in theory, is a faboo feature. I refuse to add random people that I don't know to my Facebook page just to play a game. As it turned out though, other than being another farm that you can go to, or to send a particular mystery box of random things (albeit useful if building older stuff things)... there is no advantage this feature. You cannot request materials directly from these new neighbors. Additionally, they will not see your Facebook wall (and the Farmville posts on it) so they can't respond to those requests either.

The biggest advantage these new neighbors provided was the ability to buy larger spaces for your farm. And other than random gift boxes, the occasional lost animal request, and unlocking seeds request - there is no point to having these additional neighbors. This is a fine example of granting a feature that leaves the impression that it will be helpful to the players, but in fact, more or less leaves them just as locked down as they were before the feature. [Update March 2012: It seems that they have added a feature on the send to a friend box that lists all your Farmville neighbors that you can send a mystery box OR one of three specific items to... I haven't tried it yet, so I don't know if it's actually helpful for playing the game of if it's another failed attempt at trying to keep the game playable as fewer people continue to play.]


Now that we have covered how requests and getting materials work, hopefully the actual point of this article and it's examples will make sense. Let's start with last Halloween, 2011. One got a Big Jack'o'Lantern to fill up with various goodies that one gets from a variety of things, and a building (Duckula's Castle) to build. At this point, it has become fairly standard to have a building that produces an item for the event, and a container that stores the items from the event and awards prizes.

Once upon a time, there were 3 levels of building. The more you put into the building, the fancier it got. By the time we've gotten to Duckula's Castle, there are 6 stages to the building.


In the case of the Huge Jack-O'Lantern, you can contribute treats that are gotten from "harvesting" Duckula's Castle, from items sent from neighbors on your Facebook friend's list (not the Farmville only ones), and as rewards from using crafted items for the holiday.  Multiple sources into one currency for the event.



Now lets hop to the Holidays, 2011 event.There was a building, which granted snowflakes, and crafted items granted snowflakes. However, the only way to get top hats was from asking friends. Meh, all fine and good right? Let's take a look at the balance of items needed, shall we?


Lets assume we're insane and really want the top tier Aurora Unicorn.  We'll need 120 top hats, and 28 snowflakes.  Within the game, it's exceedingly easy to get the snowflakes. I had 100 in a day or two. As for the top hats, not so much. No friends were playing anymore, and I couldn't ask the Farmville only neighbors for them.  Interesting. So they were encouraging (by way of forcing down a narrow tunnel) those who wanted items to pay for them with farm cash (in game currency paid for with real money), as that is the only way to get items when you don't have enough friends as neighbors to play the game. Hm.




Moving forward to Valentines, 2012. Same thing, a building that produces an item (Carriage that produces love arrows). I must admit to being so disgusted by all this I didn't pay attention if there was a craftable item that produced a reward or not. I was able to attain love arrows from items and neighbors farms. The Bows and Wings were only available to me from friends, or through direct requests to friends. Which again, as a person without many friends still playing, left me unable to participate in the holiday event as much as I may have wanted to. If I had wanted to win any of the other two tiers of prizes, I would either have to cajole more friends into playing, or spend money to buy the items I wanted.


Now, outright, I see nothing wrong with in game currency and it being bought with real money. That is, after all, how most of these games make their money. And I won't begrudge them that. What I find so appalling about Zynga, and in this particular case of Farmville, is that the game has become so utterly focused on farm cash items. It is less about playing a game and more about buying digital items. As someone who played Farmville in it's early days, this evolution is simultaneously funny to me (because it has strayed so far from what it was) and horrifying because of how greedy the company seems to have gotten.

So why do I find it greedy? Because it's now impossible to play the game without buying into it. I loved it when the English Countryside was introduced and there was a variety of quests to follow. It was leisurely and I could progress at my own pace and with the friends I had. Then came the Lighthouse Cove, which I found impossible to keep up with, because every quest was timed. Then the Winter Wonderland, and soon there will be a Hawaiian something or rather. All with timed quests that draw you in then cut you off at the knees if you refuse to pay loads of actual money or add people you don't know for the sake of playing a game. And by draw in, I mean they ask for 4 of something, then 8, then 12... it's subtle, but insidious.

At one point it was about fun perks or special items that enhanced the game (but were not required to play it or participate in events) and now it is almost entirely about special items by the gajillions. One is encouraged in the game to collect more and more, trying to keep up. Quests became timed, instead of open ended. Events that were once open to everyone to enjoy became more and more complex and have left people unable to participate in them and enjoy the game without "paying to win" or spamming their friends with requests. If Zynga's aim was to drive away potential customers and eviscerate customer loyalty, I imagine they've succeeded beyond their own expectations.


Maybe you already hate Farmville (or Zynga)... maybe you love them. But I logged in the other day to make sure I wasn't missing anything for this article, to open up to this:




Moving on to slots eh? Catch those gamblers! But wait! Then I logged in today.




It's like a train wreck. I just can't look away. It was one thing to see the progression of subtle coercion preying on the Pokemon mentality... to this... blatant gambling. My mouth is agape. Apparently I didn't need to write this article, or ever mention their money trees, because they just hopped straight to the punchline themselves...  rampant greed-mongering.


Saturday, December 17, 2016

I Do Not Think That Word Means What You Think It Means: Forsaken World Vampire Edition (Revised)

This was originally written by Eva Nottage under her pen name Daima Delamare (Magesplat) in July 2012. This version has been edited and reworked for clarity. 




I will never forget my first time in WoW when I had finally crafted my Black Mageweave Leggings... only to find out there was nothing "legging" like about them. They were the best gear for my character at that particular time, so I ran around like a person who forgot to put on normal clothing over her bedroom clothing. Needless to say, I take notice when armor and clothing are named in a way that suggests that they might actually involve bits of cloth doing what their namesake implies... only to be perplexed when they very much do not.

Batwing Skirts (and disturbingly unnatural waistlines) aside, I am going to amuse myself with Forsaken World's Female Vampires for today...


You too can channel many sexual fantasies...

First up, the top of choice, Channeling Mail...  we first see a generic icon that gives hope one might have a fully covered top to wear. I know, I know, but you can't blame me for hoping!  When we put it on, we see a top that, erm, well... I'm not entirely sure how it's holding in her tits, tbh... it seems to have fabric that is soft and relatively furry, and not so much anything resembling metal loops linked together to create armor. As for channeling, well, I'm sure it channels many things... but for me it's mostly multiple -headdesk-'s.


 ...but maybe you might want to consider channeling some more fabric?

Next up we have the Channeling Skirt. Lovely and voluminous, covering both legs in a truly skirt like way... and... uh... I am imagining things and need to get my eyes fixed. We actually see the barest wisp of a skirt that looks like a bit of Kleenex dangling from her... what might be a belt. (And as a vampire, I'm sure Kleenex are very utilitarian for wiping ones mouth...)  >.>   Right,  stockings that are thigh high, one of which attaches to the aforementioned belt...  ...  ....  -.- ...  A skirt you say?...


 Or just, you know, not even try... >.>

And last, and certainly, the "least".... we have the Blood Drinker's Trousers... which are nothing trouser like. In fact, near as I can tell, she's just wearing underwear still. Did I forget to put the pants on? No... they are clearly in the proper slot...  Perhaps they are invisible trousers?  - sigh-  Underwear, and by that I mean panties, do not trousers make. Being as that trousers generally cover the legs and this particular pair does nothing of the sort...

-headdesk-

Friday, October 19, 2012

Fashion Friday: .... >.> ....



Meet Rose, she's a character in the social game Ravenskye City. 


Rose is ... well... very well endowed. You know, with large tracts of land. 



 The thing is... I am beginning to wonder if... well...  0.o  

If she's a paper doll. 

Or if, her large tracts of land were added akin to hair extensions.



They just don't look cohesive. Or like they belong there.

They kinda look like water balloons tied in a pillow case and wrapped around her.

It's like someone decided, "Hey! Lets draw a larger sized humanoid, stick a bird head on it shaped like a squashed pear, and lets smack two eggs on the front of her chest like a kangaroo pouch."

>.>

Normally, I'd be the first to applaud plus sized anything in a game. 

And I appreciate the thought. I do. 

Poor execution + IT'S A BIRD (non-flying, apparently)  =  -headdesk-

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

WTF Weds: Your shitting mi...



This, my duckies, is a goat from the newest incarnation of Farmville,
known every so creatively as: Farmville 2.


It's the original Farmville's 3D, mostly animated, younger sibling with an interesting take on mechanics gleaned from all of it's distant and not so distant Zynga game cousins. Thusfar, it is not a ridiculous farce of... it isn't a money grubbing greed mongering... -sigh-... my colorful opinions of Zynga's company strategies aside, it isn't half bad. (Yet. I will curb my pending rants for the time being to get to the point...)




As you've guessed it, I wouldn't be writing about it if there wasn't something utterly mockable to gape at and tilt ones head to the side while blinking stunned with the letters WTF dancing perplexedly through the field one of ones vision...

So, I present to you, in video, when I fed a goat in order to get drops from this goat to further my progress in the game.  I assure you, I'm not getting all fancy or anything, it's just that... >.>  to really...  <.<  understand...  >.>   you have to see it in it's full animated glory. 


The phrase... "squeezing one off" comes to mind...


For the record, I don't blame the goat. I'd stiffen up in a hurry too while crapping out an entire fully formed bottle of milk from my rectum too. I'd also jump around elated with a ginormous grin on my face once having rid myself of such an uncomfortable thing from inside my body.

It makes me want to go to Farmville's special husbandry school where they teach the anatomy of goats and explains the magic that causes their entirely organic bodies to create glass and perfectly formed and in bottle shape. I mean seriously, just think of all the costs saved on packaging when you could have a herd of fantasy-land goats that do it for you, no need for factories or packaging plants!

-.-

Thursday, July 19, 2012

My Three Favorite Things about Uldum


Ahhh, Uldum. For being a blechy desert, I found this to be one of my favorite zones. Honestly, the majority of my screen captures are from here for the blog. Come to think of it, maybe that's not a good thing >.>

Regardless, I am going to share with you some of my favorite things about Uldum:


3.  Armadillos. 

Ok, so sue me. It made me happy to see an Armadillo.  They don't have to worry about being road pizzas here, that's gotta be worth something, right?



2. The Quests!   

From the pun-ridden Fashionism quest, to the slightly more complex Nazi mockery (and the hilarious quest to restore Gobbles to his former glory gone wrong... we've covered this before, and I am a sick sick person, but there is just something awesome about flambe.. at least it wasn't my doing this time >.>) to of course all of the Dr. Jones quests and Brann's penchant for statues shooting lasers from their eyes.


 Dr. Jones father is a dwarf...  this explains so much!


1.  GAY CATMAN ENCLAVE.

Think about it. I never saw a female cat-thing anywhere.

I never saw children cat-things anywhere.

I looked, I really did. Nary a cat-thing other than male. 

So I did my homework, they were orginally Tol'vir, created by the Titans, and some succumbed to the curse of the flesh.... >.>... which really, only makes it worse, cuz ... welll.... >.>   (I hope I'm not ruining the surprise of Blizzards plan for a yaoi comic spinoff...)

And yeah, I guess the titans could have only made male cat-people... but the dwarves have males and females....  and it really doesn't help that my first thought running into the chained prince when I got to the zone was "Thundercats, Hoooo!".....

  Thundercats, HOOOOOOOOO!!!


I'm just going to battle this huge monster cat thing while you contemplate that...

 I've battled you five times, stop glitching and let me pass already!!!

Friday, July 6, 2012

Fashion Friday: I do not think that word means what you think it means.... Forsaken World Vampire Edition



I will never forget my first time in WoW, when I had finally crafted my Black Mageweave leggings... only to find out that they had nothing "legging" like about them. >.<   They were the best gear at that particular time for me so I ran around like a person who forgot to put on normal clothing over her bedroom clothing. Needless to say, I take notice when things are named in a way that suggests that they might actually involve bits of cloth doing what their name implies... only to be perplexed when they very much do not.

Batwing Skirts (and disturbingly unnatural waistlines) aside, I am going to amuse myself with Forsaken World's Female Wampires for today...


You too can channel many sexual fantasies...

First up, the top of choice, Channeling Mail...  we first have a generic icon that gives hope one might have a fully covered top. I know, I know, but you can't blame me for hoping!  We see a top that, erm, well... I'm not entirely sure how it's holding in her tits, tbh... that seems to have fabric that is soft and relatively furry, and not so much anything resembling metal loops linked together to create armor. As for channeling, well, I'm sure it channels many things... but for me it's mostly multiple -headdesk-'s.


 ...but maybe you might want to consider channeling some more fabric?

Next up we have the Channeling Skirt. Lovely and voluminous, covering both legs in a truly skirt like way... and... uh... I am imagining things and need to get my eyes fixed. We actually have the barest wisp of a skirt that looks like a bit of Kleenex dangling from her... what might be a belt. (And as a vampire, I'm sure Kleenex are very utilitarian for wiping ones mouth...)  >.>   Right,  stockings that are thigh high, one of which attaches to aforementioned belt...  ...  ....  -.- ...  A skirt you say?...


 Or just, you know, not even try... >.>

And last, and certainly, the "least".... we have the Blood Drinker's Trousers... which are nothing trouser like. In fact, near as I can tell, she's just wearing underwear still. Did I forget to put the pants on? No... they are clearly in the proper slot...  Perhaps they are invisible trousers?  - sigh-  Underwear, and by that I mean panties, do not trousers make. Being as that trousers generally cover the legs and this particular pair does nothing of the sort...

-headdesk- 

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

WTF Weds: Sherbet Colored Pyrite!

So I'm out gathering metals through mining in WoW, flapping around on my flying thing through all the new Catacylsm areas... and find myself mining Pyrite. Awesome! I will refrain from wondering why the substance commonly referred to as "fool's gold" has a higher level than actual gold in the game.... >.> .... and move right to the point.


Why the fuck is there ice cream in my mining bag?!?


I mean seriously...Why on Azeroth is Pyrite SHERBET colored?!?

 Now I'm hungry >.<


It's a metal. Not a crystal. It could be shiny and glittery... but more in a Tiger's eye way than anything else... I cannot tell you how many nights I ruminated about this trying to understand. Well, my duckies, I have concluded that this is why:

 
Once upon a time there was a mage who loved to flambe things. Innocent squirrels, friendly murlocs (who were only trying to say hello through all the salt water they were gurggling!).. and the occasional irrational being that wouldn't fork over whatever she needed to make someone happy... like five handfuls of oozing mucus from bubble blowing sand crawlers. (Fear the bubbles, PHEAR THEM!)  

Regardless, she flambe'd without mercy and without much discrimination and one day accidentally tried to flambe the wrong thing and got sucked into a vacuum to another dimension... with stripes. And polka dots. And maybe a fuzzy purple people eater or two. Maybe three. (Who had all been promptly flambe'd.) 

She lost count when she ran across a zebra whose stripes were unraveling which she found to be a very odd and unsettling sight. "Uhm, you seem to be unraveling...." she said. 

"You think?!?" the peevish and obviously irate zebra replied.  

"Have you tried...." she started to say before being cut off by the zebra who shouted, "DO I LOOK LIKE I HAVE HANDS TO YOU?".... so she...blinked. And stared, a bit startled, before saying cautiously, "Well, obviously you don't, you are a zebra...." and began to wonder just what kind of warpyworld version of a dimension she was in.  

The zebra however, having expressed his frustration, calmed down and studied her… which made her feel rather uncomfortable. She began to wonder if he was carnivorous.  The zebra, however, had realized she was not from this dimension. He walked right up to her and got in her face and stared at her unblinking. 

Then, quite simply he said, "I demand a pencil. Yes, a pencil. A pencil is what I need," the zebra murmured while backing back out of her personal comfort zone and looking at her expectantly.
"Err...." she started to say before being cut off again.  "You will go to the forest of sticks and stones and do battle with the essays of StayedUpWayToLateToFInishThatOne and their minions, the distractor disco balls of sparkly destruction.  Their leader, Writers Block, has a pencil."  

The mage, finding all this... beyond ridiculous, closed her eyes, took a deep breathe, exhaled, and pinched herself as hard as she could. She was rather disappointed to find herself still staring at the zebra whens she opened her eyes again.  Begrudgingly, she asked what direction to head in.  The stressed out zebra of improbability scratched out a map with his hoof for her, and she memorized it and went off to retrieve the pencil.  

It was about halfway through the essays that she realized she could probably teleport herself back to her home.  However, being a mage of her word, followed through and got the pencil to help the zebra draw back his stripes and ended the escapade with a better understanding of why pyrite looks like rainbow sherbet in her mining bag.


... You didn't actually expect a logical answer, did you?